If you know where the title has come from, then the first part of this blog post will make sense to you. If not, I feel bad for you.
Anyway. So I may not be the Bay Harbor Butcher, but I feel like I have a lot in common with Dexter Morgan. Dexter kills people who are bad, more specifically people who are murders. I take people, and expose them for who they really are, sort of like Dexter does. But, mine is more of in a relationship sense. I seem to find the people with a dark, dark past, and then magically once we start to date or create a bond, the demons release itself. It just happened with my most recent relationship. He put on an amazing front; he was kind and caring and had my parents falling for him and for how he treated me. Then, magically, it all went away with one look of his phone.
I feel like I have to be like Dexter and hide how I really feel. I feel broken and used and like I deserved this. But do I really? Do I need to be emotionless? No. No I do not. So then I got to thinking, and this is where the second part of this post will come into play. What do I deserve? What should I look for out of a guy from now on. So I have come up with a list. And that poor sucker better have every single quality or else. (Okay, maybe not or else, but still, it'd be nice.)
The list goes as follows:
1. Must have a job. Not a job where he will get laid off from within a week of us dating. But an honest to God job where he has a steady income.
2. He needs to open doors for me. Whether it be into a restaurant or my car door. Why? Because chivalry isn't dead. And sometimes I like to feel like a woman who's arms are broken so that I can't open my own damn door.
3. He must be smart. It takes a lot to understand certain things, and it seems like the smart ones understands those things better. However, the first conversation of his fucking IQ, and I will IQ the shit out of his face. ;)
4. He must be family orientated. He must be close with his parents, or more specifically his mother. And he should want kids. At least one, but more than that is also a plus.
5. He should want to volunteer. I do a lot of volunteer work for Relay and the CFK campaign or for the veterans. It'd be nice to have someone there for me to do those things with.
6. A sense of adventure. I always come up with ideas that I want to do, but never follow through with it because I don't want to do things alone.
7. Staying in. As much as I complain about wanting to go out and do things, there's nothing I love more than staying in, watching Netflix or renting a movie, cuddling and just relaxing. So being okay with those things is also a must.
8. And last, but not least, he must have a sense of humor. I am extremely outgoing and I like to joke, sometimes at the expense of others. So if you can't handle the way I go about things, there's the door chief.
I know it won't be easy. Hell, dating never is. But I know if it's meant to be, it will be.
